My last post I wrote how we weren't sure what was going to happen, well I of course got very scared and freaked out a little, maybe a lot.  I also prayed a lot.  I prayed for God to please move some mountains, please make this happen.  So for the next week, I started hearing more songs with the lyrics God can move mountains, faith can move mountains, on church signs I was reading faith moves mountains.  I love it when god speaks to me, it is AMAZING to say the least.  I came out of that uncertainty with a more certainty than ever before.  I have been saying from the very beginning that I felt God put us here for a reason.  I felt that God had been paving the way for us to adopt.  So why was I so worried?? If I honestly believed that this was God's plan then it would happen, no matter what.

Well I am happy to say our Homestudy is finally complete!  I was able to review it today, next it will be reviewed by our placing agency, once it is approved we can finally move on to the next step.  The next step is immigrations, we have to be approved by the USCIS and then finally we will be able to send all of our paper work, which is a lot, to China.......It is somewhat overwhelming, I try to take it one paper at a time.  I know God has a plan and I am to wait and allow Him to put it in to place as He plans, I have done really good lately about having some patience and not being quite so worried about the timeline.  I know it will happen and we will have our child that God has planned for us, but to those of you that have been pregnant, remember how 20 weeks seemed like it would never come.....I just want to find our precious child and look at her picture and know that she is mine, just like you can't wait for that 20 week ultrasound, to look at that little heart beat fluttering away and maybe find out if it's a boy or girl. 

Tonight I ran into someone who I don't really know but our paths keep crossing.  We were talking about adoption and she was telling me how she feels that it is God's calling for her to adopt, however her husband doesn't agree.  I was telling her that we were in the exact same place about a year ago.  My heart was aching inside for another child and Mike was not feeling the same want or need for another child as I was.  I told her all I can say is to pray, pray for her husband and pray for God's guidance.  That was what I did, I prayed for God to soften his heart and open it to the possibility of adoption.  I completely believe in God's plans for us...."plans to prosper us not to harm us" (Jeremiah 29:11)  and even though we want it here and now, God's timing may be a little different. Maybe Mike was not ready then because our child was not yet born.  I obviously do not know for sure why God does what He does or when He does it, but I do know God makes no mistakes and we will find our child only when God presents her to us, all in His perfect timing.

I have read so many adoptive blogs and talked to many adoptive parents and there is always a comment about the "bumps in the road" and how stressful the process is.  I have been thinking this whole time that things were going so smoothly and we hadn't really had any "bumps".  Well today we came upon a ditch.....I can't go in to much detail right now but please pray it all works out.  We will find out more tomorrow, so for now just pray.  I have strongly believed that we were led here by God and only God, so I know He has a plan for us, I honestly believe His plan for us is to adopt.  So I will pray and put all my trust in Him; that He will make this happen as He has planned.

I love this!!!
We finished our homestudy about 2 weeks ago, so we are just waiting on it to be completed and approved.....I continue to try and have patience with this and know it is all in God's hands, but I am so anxious and ready to meet her, or atleast see her picture. 
We will be very busy this summer with baseball.  Chase made Allstars!! He is so excited! He has been working so hard and doing so good this season, pitching, catching, and hitting.  I love watching the three of them play sports.  Since we have started this process a lot of things have become more apparent to me.  For instance orphans probably don't get to play sports on a team, they probably no nothing about organized sports, and even more they don't have parents cheering them on, with anything they do or accomplish.  I find myself thinking of these things often.  Last week while we were in Las Vegas for a nursing conference I walked around these beautiful hotels and watched Cirque de Soleil and ate WAY too much food and thought how the orphans have probably never even been in a crowd or seen many things outside the orphanage walls.  We ate at Maggiano's, Yummy, However, I felt SO guilty.  We had ordered more food than any of us could eat, how could we just throw it all away, so we packed it all up (there were 6 to go boxes packed full of food) and passed it out to the homeless.  As greatful as I am for my life and where we live and all that we have, I am constantly realizing how much we don't need and how the things we think are neccesary, really aren't.  These kids need nothing more than love, forever love and they deserve that.  I mean can you imagine growing up without your parents, without a family, without a home?  I can't and if I can help just one to have a forever family than that's one less orphan out there. 

~For He has Risen, He has Risen indeed........
We had a great Spring Break, enjoying some time with my mom at her cabin in Blue Ridge.  It's so peaceful and relaxing there.  The kids loved playing in the hot tub and taking the dogs on walks.  We went to the movies to see "Mirror Mirror".  Cute movie, the theater was very interesting, only 2 theaters in the building and one man working the window, snack stand, and the actual movies themselves.  Oh and they did not take debit cards.......We came home Wednesday, Thursday night Chase started running a fever but seemed fine Friday.  Saturday we went to an Easter egg hunt with family and friends and on the way home Chase threw up ALL OVER the back of our NEW van........poor guy, he felt horrible.  Then today, on Easter, at church, he took a terrible fall and has banged up both knees, hip, and shoulders.  In fact I'm a little worried about his knees, they are both so swollen but look so different......not good I know. He was playing and walking on them fine earlier but since we got home tonight he has been in a good bit of pain.  Wait and see how he is tomorrow.....
     So today was Easter.  I had to work last night so I was unable to go to church with the family this morning.:-(  No Easter pics yet, I will be putting them back in their Easter outfits for a picture, of course.....We went to my Mom's this evening for dinner and another Easter egg hunt, I got rab'd (means they weren't busy and didn't need everyone schedued) so I didn't have to go back to work tonight, well not yet anyway, I'm on call.
     Nothing new on the adoption front as of now.  Still trying to plan our last home study meeting, we all 5 have to be here together.  Not so easy right now with Mike in school and the kids in sports and me working nights.  All in God's time.......

"6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Philippians 4:6-7



My new "addiction" is reading blogs of others who have adopted.  I was reading one tonight about her third adoption in China.  She was talking about how her daughter had a horrible diaper rash, by the picture it looked like it was everywhere the diaper had been, not just the baby's bottom.  Tears just came to my eyes thinking about how these poor chidren lay in their diapers full of urine and feces, probably ALL day.  Yes there are "nannies" or caretakers at the orphanage to care for these little ones, but there are probably 30 kids to a room.  She also mentioned how the babies in the baby room lay in there crib all day, just staring at the ceiling, not getting any attention or love.  Oh how my heart aches for those kids.  I am praying for patience, again, I just can't wait for there to be 1 less orphan in this world.

Do you know that there are 147 million orphans, and God commands us to take care of them

(James 1:27)

For some of us He calls us to adoption!

 

I don't know where to start.......We're adopting! I have been praying for God to show me what His will is for me. I have also prayed for a fourth child, for 2 years. Now we are in the process of adopting a child from China. It's excting and overwhelming, more exciting though. I can't wait to meet her!
We have one more Homestudy meeting with our social worker! So many things to get together and do.....so worth it though. I had to put off getting things done last week because we had to buy 2 new cars, yes 2! The truck was not worth the amount of money it would have cost to fix it and the van was beginning to show it's age and usage, so we decided to go ahead and get rid of the both of them. No car payments in 2 years, now we have 2. Oh well, what do ya do???
Let me start at the beginning......Mike and I chose after a very difficult pregnancy with Taylor that we would make it permanent to no longer have kids. Well, I was ok with it in the beginning, but after a few years, realized I really wasn't! I have been hoping, wanting, praying for a 4th child for about 2 years now. Yes, a 4th child.....I have asked myself the same thing over and over, Why? I would think "Why am I so stuck on this? Why can't I get past this? I have 3 healthy, beautiful children. Why can't I just be happy with what I have? Am I being selfish?" I was happy, I AM happy, and so thankful that God has given me these three children. But no matter what, I could not get the thought of another child out of my head, or heart. I mentioned this to many people, but when someone responded "Sometimes, God puts these things on our hearts for a reason." I decided to stop feeling so guilty about it. I just prayed he would either take this want away or bless me with another child. I thought a lot about adoption as well as a vasectomy reversal or I would just pray, pray God would perform a miracle and his vasectomy would reverse itself or that God would open Mike's heart and he would consider adoption......Mike and I talked a lot about this over the years and he was not quite on board with the idea of a fourth child. Finally, in November he was "warming" up to the idea. Then on January 2nd, he agreed! Then about a week or so later, Mike looked into the vasectomy reversal and wanted me to consider it, but as I thought about it, I kind of freaked out. It was then that it all began to make sense to me. Along with praying for another child I also prayed for God to show me His will for me and my life. I want to live for Him, do what He wants of me. This is when I realized why God had placed this want of a 4th child on my heart, why I had a bad pregnancy and agreed to Mike's vasectomy. His will for me, for us, is to adopt.
             I say this with certainty because God has shown me. A few months ago when Mike was on the fence, I thought to myself how I hoped I would run into one of Ella's, friend's, mom. Ella had a friend in preschool that had been adopted from China and I had seen her mom at the gym a couple of times, years ago. Well, January 3rd, the day after Mike agreed to the adoption, I ran into her mom at the gym........I know, crazy, huh! We talked and she put me in contact with someone who has been a great help with my MANY questions. That same day I met a good friend for lunch who told me about a social worker that we go to church with, who specializes in adoption and had adopted herself. Long story short that is the social worker now doing our homestudy. Ella's friend's, mom also invited me to a Chinese New Year celebration, to meet others who had adopted or were in the process of adoption. I took the kids, Mike was sick, and ran into one of Taylor's favorite teachers from preschool last year, who was just starting the process as well. It's been such a blessing having these people to talk to.  I truelly feel God is paving the way for us. It's been tedious, yes, but kind of easy as well. I can only give God credit for what we are doing, and continue to pray for His guidance and help, and ask you to do the same.